Wanted: Mojo

Mine's gone missing. Positively, definitely, no doubt about it....gone. I do geeky PR, the kind where the men outnumber the women in most situations 3:1. Given the region that I cover, sometimes it more like 8:1. Last night at the T3 awards I couldn't pull for love or money and I think I looked pretty cute plus I brought the girls. The fit bloke seated next to me at dinner ended up getting lured by a lass who mysteriously switched her engagement ring to the other hand by the entree and started referring to her "boyfriend" as loudly as possible by dessert. There were men everywhere, straight men everywhere and not a one for me. The only semblence of male attention I got all night was when I was gratuitously groped by the very gay emcee when I went to accept our award. This leads to me to only one conclusion, my mojo has gone missing. It's happened before, about 2 years ago, and I can't remember how I found it again but I better sort it out quickly. Resigned to no attention and too much to drink I also made the mistake of digging into my goodie bag and eating cheese and onion Hula Hoops in the cab on the way back to mine securing my spot in loner ville for at least another 24 hours.