Septic

Thanks to all the idiots in the world, every once in awhile I have great material for my blog. On this fine Thursday, I bring you the top 10 things NOT to do when someone takes the time to tell you in person that they don't want to date you any longer. Let's all keep in mind that not returning calls and ignoring emails is still a popular method of telling someone to bugger off, even when we are grown ups. No one owes you anything and the fact that they are a big enough person to tell you in person should count for something.

10. It's not advisable to start criticising their appearance. Are you bloated or have you just gained weight isn't an acceptable question.
9. Telling the person that it wouldn't have worked anyway and proceeding to list why. Goes over like a lead balloon.
8. Are you mental? I don't really know what to add here, pretty much speaks for itself.
7. Verbally listing all the times YOU paid for something and claiming they owe you for those things. At least this one inspires a good laugh.
6.Asking if you have been waiting to tell them this ALL NIGHT. I think 20 minutes into the evening is a perfectly acceptable amount of time to work up the nerve. Especially given the reaction.
5. Asking if THIS is why you never had sex with them.
4. Telling them good luck EVER finding anyone who will put up with their shit. And by shit I think this septic bloke meant "busy schedule"
3. Claiming that even though you don't care, there's a good chance you will go home, drink yourself into a stupor and never wake up again. Yeah, cos suicide is hillarious to joke about.
2. Accusing them of not giving you a fair shot. I list this as 2 because you will notice that 9 and 4 came before this gem.
1. Ask if they can set you up with any of their single friends.